[ The same unspoken sentiments had been swelling in her chest since the moment she laid eyes on him — no, since the moment she'd even heard he was back. And she knows that's foolish — recklessly sentimental even, because there's always the chance that someday she's going to drag her tired aching body back from a mission and he won't be there waiting with his stupid shiteating grin and his "Hey, Andy", casual as you please. That's just how it is in this line of work. People die. Reputation aside, she isn't infallible either.
It's a keen awareness of that fact that gives a hard edge to her kiss as she takes his mouth for her own, her hands sliding back into his hair, tugging at the roots and breaking up the tangled curls as her fingers look for purchase. She grinds down into his lap, rubbing her body against his under the water as she kisses him to the point of breathlessness — leaving her words rough and ragged when she finally whispers into that minute space between their mouths: ]
I hated it. [ Lowly: ] I hated not knowing where you were. If you were alive or dead.
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It's a keen awareness of that fact that gives a hard edge to her kiss as she takes his mouth for her own, her hands sliding back into his hair, tugging at the roots and breaking up the tangled curls as her fingers look for purchase. She grinds down into his lap, rubbing her body against his under the water as she kisses him to the point of breathlessness — leaving her words rough and ragged when she finally whispers into that minute space between their mouths: ]
I hated it. [ Lowly: ] I hated not knowing where you were. If you were alive or dead.