sekkritaus | Hogwarts / Wizarding World AU

Hah. Not going to happen, so don't get your hopes up.

[ It wasn't even that he was against having kids, necessarily. He just didn't even think about them. What was the point, if it would be without Andy?

The last comment stung far deeper that it meant to, and Poe frowned as he tugged at the edges of the sweater, falling just barely half way down his thighs. He tugged at it roughly, not looking at her. ]

Yeah. Least I'm good for something. [ He muttered, and even he could hear the bitterness in it. He let out a breath and started down the hall. ]

I specifically requested Giggle Water, so there better be some.

[ The tone of his voice makes her pause again, eyebrows slightly pinched at his back as he turns away to move down the hall. Can't they just — sweep whatever emotional hiccup they just had under the rug and push through, back to their version of normal? Blame it on feelings running high after so much time apart and leave well enough alone.

Maybe the alcohol will help. If anybody followed through on that request for Giggle Water. Debatable though — Andy's been known to be a mercurial drunk. ]

You're good for plenty. [ She answers mildly at length, finally coming to catch up with him. ] But there's not much point in going through the trouble with someone new. We've been fucking since our Hogwarts days — you already know what I like.

[ That's the excuse anyway. ]

Uh huh.

[ He sighed, trying to shove it all away again. It didn't matter. He didn't know why he was so prickly- it wasn't as if anything has changed. So he forced himself to turn around and forced himself to smirk at her in his stupid sweater. ]

Which is how I know you love it when I say shit like I'm going to take you in every way I can have you while I'm feeling you up.

[ There. See? Completely unromantic. Cool. Great. The subject could be closed now forever. ]

[ Andy gives him a flat little look. Not because she wouldn’t be into that exactly - funny how being in love with a person for half your life will make you amenable to most anything that involves their hands on you - but he is being prickly. Which is, in turn, making her prickly. ]

Yeah, that’s real sexy, Dameron. [ Dryly: ] Almost makes me want to tear that ugly sweater off you.

[ Instead, she brushes by him on her way to the kitchen to look for something alcoholic. Over her shoulder: ]

Maybe after you tell me what the hell crawled up your ass and died just now.

Nothing.

[ It's a blatant lie. He follows her into the kitchen and starts digging around for booze. ]

I'm fine.

[ Still obviously a lie. ]

I'm just - tired. [ More honest. ] It was a long couple of months. [ Technically true. ]

[ She knows he’s not fine. And honestly? It pisses her off a little that he would try to pass such a blatant lie by her - her, his bedt friend since puberty. It’s hypocrisy, of course, but it doesn’t stop the feeling. ]

Don’t do that. [ Andy crouches to try a few of the cabinets. ] if you don’t want to tell me, fine. But don’t say it’s alright when it’s not.

Fine. I'm upset but I don't want to talk about it.

[ He found the alcohol in one of the upper cupboards, but it wasn't giggle water, it was fire whisky. Great. Well at least that way he'd feel like he'd want to die on double time.

He pulled out two of the bottles, and held one out to her. ]

I'm sure I'll feel better once we fuck it out of me. [ He managed to only sound a little bitter. ]

Edited 2018-12-31 06:31 (UTC)

[ Yeah. Okay. She's going to need a drink before she deals with this. Andy helps herself to a big swig of fire whiskey — ah, fuck, that stuff always burns — wiping her mouth with the back of her hand and setting the bottle down on the table harder than really necessary. ]

Alright. Fine.

[ She's closing distance now, with some determination — putting her hands on him, shoving him up against the kitchen counter, and roughly wedging her thigh between his. ]

Is this how you fucking want it? [ Her voice has gone low and little biting. ] You'd rather do this then just talk to me?

You don't want to talk, Andy. [ His body wasn't help him, though. He had been in negative percentage points for his arousal literally three seconds ago, but her thigh presses against him and he stirs anyway, despite himself. He didn't reach out for her, though. Just took her shoves. ]

Because soon as I start talking you're going to give me shit. It doesn't matter. Okay? Yeah. I fucking missed you. More than you missed me, probably.

I spent like four weeks of it half convinced you were dead. And when I finally get to see you, you gotta go and make fun of me for making it romantic or whatever and it totally ruins my mood.

[ Technically the truth. It did ruin his mood, but not the way he's implying. ]

I'm just relieved to see you and happy to be here. You don't need to get on my case about it.

[ This is how you convinced someone you didn't love them, right? By getting offended at the implication? ]

[ He's not... Wrong. She doesn't really want to talk about this. And yeah, her way of coping with a lot of it is to give him shit. So it's not fair for her to call him out on this now, not when she's been so good at shutting him out all these years — keeping that last wall up, even as she keeps seeking intimacy, sexual or otherwise. None of it is fair. It's a wonder he's not angry with her for it more often. ]

What the hell does that even mean, you missed me more than I missed you? [ Annoyance, in her voice and written all over her face. ] You're the only fucking thing I thought about on that mission. Your dumb ass is the reason I tried so hard to get back! And I practically dumped myself in your lap the minute we got here.

[ She gestures with one hand in frustration, as if indicating all the bullshit, all around them. ]

So what, now you're pissed I was messing with you a little? Like I haven't been giving you shit since the day we met?

[ Fucking--

She wasn't wrong. It was him that was acting out, not her. She was just the same way she always was. He was just angry that it wasn't more. But he'd known that, going in. He'd known that wasn't going to be how it was, and he was still here, wasn't he? He didn't want to be anywhere else.

And her angrily yelling that she did all of that for him did, at least, remind him that he wasn't the only one who cared. She might not love him, but she cared about him, and here he was, being an asshole.

He just needed to fucking get over himself. ]

Yeah, yeah, I fucking know. [ He leaned forward abruptly to give her a smack of a kiss on the cheek - his usual sign of surrender. ]

I know. Sorry.

[ He didn't want to push it. Even as upset as he was, if she figured out the real reason he was upset, that'd be it. He finally reached out for her, threading an arm around her waist and pulling her closer. ]

They should just know better than to put us on seperate missions. I get antsy.

[ The truth is this: The things she says to him are things you say to the person you love - and it’s nothing short of idiocy that she’s convinced herself not saying those last three words changes the fact that she loves him and will probably always love him. What real harm would the words do now, when she’s been following him like a shadow all these years? When he’s the reason for everything she does? When he’s there one person she always wants to come home to.

But that rule she made when she was a stupid little girl - they’ve lived by it for so long now, it seems impossible that she could ever take it back. That, after all this time, he would take her back. It’s more than she should have, that they’re here together now. Even with the fighting and the ugly sweaters and the distinct lack of Giggle Water. ]

...Sometimes I think they do it on purpose. [ A twinge of annoyance lingers in her voice, but even that fades quickly. That brief kiss he gives her is enough to placate her temper - that, and the way he pulls her close. It’s practically automatic by now, the way she drapes her arms loosely over his shoulders. ] But fuck them. I’ll do what it takes to get back to you, even just for a quickie in the tub and some cheap fire whiskey.

Who said anything about 'just'?

[ You did, Poe, when you slammed hard into the denial train. But he only mumbles it and then presses a kiss to her throat. What the hell is wrong with him, that she gets in his vicinity and it's like someone takes a match to tinder. ]

I thought you were going to make me keep my word on the every way I could have you thing? [ It's just muttered into her skin? Just above the edge of her terrible sweater.

It's also a blatant apology, but neither of them were very good at those. ]

[ As if Andy's any better. It probably speaks to some dysfunction, that she'd break his heart because she wanted him too much and then keep coming back for this anyway — years later, still hungry to be kissed by him, still wanting few things more than to put her hands on his bare skin. Sometimes she's sorry for it — sorry that the wound never fully closes, because she can't ever pull away fully — but not sorry enough to stop. ]

Wasn't sure we were still in the mood. [ Mild wryness, not so biting like it was before — but punctuated by the pointed press of her thigh a little harder between his. ] But you know me. [ Her hands start to wander, skimming along the hem of his equally terrible sweater. ] I could be pissed at you and still want to fuck you stupid.

[ His arousal grew against her thigh, slowly but streadily, and he rolled his hips a little, completely unconciously. ]

Well, you know me. I could be completely pissed with you and therefore want you to fuck me stupid.

[ He let his hands slip down the curve of her backside, his fingers slipping under the hem, indenting her ass as he gripped into it. He pulled her a little closer, trying go edge her towards his lap. ]

You've always been able to do that to me.

Yeah? [ A hint of amused affection softens the dryness of her voice. ] Even when we were awkward teenagers?

[ She resists his pull — just for a moment, just to feel the way the motion draws tension into his grip on her, and maybe just to be a little bit of a jerk before she yields, shifting her stance so that she can press her body flush against his. Her hands, still eager for skin, find their way up under that awful orange sweater, brushing exploratory fingertips over his ribs. ]

You'd think you would've outgrown that by now.

Are you kidding? Especially when we were awkward teenagers.

[ Fuck, she felt so good against him, just like this. Not even sexually, just - her weight against his. He stifled the sudden desperate desire to just hug her, and kneaded his fingers into her ass instead. Almost as good. ]

I think the first time I ever came properly - intentionally, anyway - was after I angrily got off after you punched me that one time.

You've seen you, right? Like in a mirror?

[ That actually earns an entertained little exhale — something that could have been a laugh, with a bit more effort. It makes her eyes crinkle faintly at the corners, and her mouth turns upward ever so slightly on one side. ]

Is that why you were always pissing me off? Because you were into getting punched by me? [ As if she didn't get off plenty of times after their scuffles and arguments. Being a teenage girl around someone as attractive as Poe Dameron had been frustrating sometimes, on a number of levels. She did what she had to, really. ] I think I just didn't know what to do with such a pretty-looking boy. So I went with my gut and socked you.

[ One of those wandering hands gives the side of his ass a cheeky little slap — since she's less inclined to punch him these days, but still gets a kick out of bullying him a bit. ]

[ The muscle tensed under the slap, but the rest of him was slowly relaxing, even allowing a small smile. ]

Yeah, I definitely did it on purpose. It meant you looked at me. It didn't just help my beating, though[ Har har ], you were always vicious on the quidditch pitch if you were pissed with me.

I had no idea what to do with you, I just knew that whatever I was doing, you were who I wanted to do it with.

[ He says that, and the feeling of reciprocation is so strong it almost feels like a physical thing inside her gut. It's the same sentiment that's been guiding every choice she's made all this years: No matter what he did, she wanted to do it with him. Hearing it voiced out loud makes her features unconsciously soften a little, her expression warmed by the words.

So much for misfires. ]

I had to protect your ass, so I could kick it later. [ With a quiet wryness: ] That, and it's a pretty good ass. Good enough that I've been following you around all this time, half just for the view.

Well, it's yours whenever you want it. [ Just as wry. ]

Why do you think I even bother to stay in shape, other than to give you a view?

As if I wouldn't like you just the same, with a little extra weight. [ She gives his side a little pinch for emphasis, mean in her affection like she always is. ] It's cute that you try though, just for me. That ass really motivates a girl to get to the office in the morning.

[ All her mocking and bullying aside, it's damn near gentle when she leans to kiss him. ]

[ He was about to give a sassy reply, something about how God knew something was required to get her into the office in the morning. But then she was kissing him and it was so soft and perfect that it silenced him with a quiet, low groan at the back of his throat.

He slid his hands up her hips, baring her thighs and hips - as well as the dark triangle of hair between her legs as he rolled the hem of her shirt up her ribs, his fingers grazing her skin as they went.

He tried to pull her more onto his lap, sliding his ass a little more throughly onto the counter top so that he could pull her with him. ]

Like I said, it's yours anyway. Been a while since you really claimed it, though...

Is that a request?

[ Andy's got that mean little smirk on her face, the one that says she's getting ideas. She lets him pull her in, but only so she can nudge her way between his legs, settling her hands on his thighs and giving them an emphatic squeeze before sliding them higher up, underneath the hem of his sweater to just lightly brush against his cock. ]

You really must have missed me.

[ It'd been maybe what, half an hour? Well he did say to give him twenty minutes, and apparently he wasn't lying - because as soon as her fingers brush against him his cock jumps with the touch, raising the hem of the sweater up by half an inch. ]

You say that like I wouldn't request it anyway.

And depends. You gonna yell at me while you do it?

[ A beat. ]

Because that would be super hot.

Hogwarts / Wizarding World AU

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